The Wisdom of a Fool Won't Set You Free

AND AWAY

1:13 AM on Friday, the 9th of May, 2008

A'ight, I'm in Spokane, and fenrirvallin, satyrist, and I are leaving for Emerald City Con in the morning. If anyone wants to meet up, send an e-mail to lwood@greatwesteng.com. That one's tied to my Blackberry, so if you send a phone number, I'll give you a shout with our plans. Right now, we have no plans, except for a general sort of YAY ROAD TRIP ADVENTURE ideal.

YAY ADVENTURE.

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Any Day Now

10:20 AM on Friday, the 2nd of May, 2008

Dr. Redwine: "If five million men suffered unbearable pain during sex, bowel movements, and exercise, and were offered feminizing hormones or surgical castration as treatment, our attitudes would be quite different."

FUCKIN SERIOUSLY.

Another of Dr. Redwine's papers notes that the majority of OB/GYNs focus on the OB side of things, and subsequently focus primarily on fertility. Let's treat this disease so you can get pregnant. The problem is, the most noticeable and life altering symptom of endometriosis is severe, chronic abdominal and pelvic pain, and most doctors sideline the treatment of pain in order to make sure their patients can get pregnant.

Admittedly, I probably zoomed in on his research because his opinions line up with mine, but then again, he seems to reach a much more logical set of conclusions compared to other doctors I've talked to and other papers I've read. He also provides a lot of backing statistics and references to research, which means a lot more to me, as a recovering science nerd, than getting lectured by a doctor for 3 hours who tells me his conclusions are correct because he said so. Statistics and decades of clinical research mean more to me than how Doctor X treated his daughter when she purportedly had the same disease.

It's too bad he's in Central Bumblefuck, Oregon. I may submit my records to him for review, though, just to see if he has any suggestions. He might know a doctor in Montana who he would recommend to start my treatment. I mean, how else am I going to find a doctor? I had two GYNs when I was in high school who told me what I was going through was normal, so I'm not going back to either of them. My Bozeman doc was a recommendation from the ultrasound tech in the ER after I thought my appendix was going to 'splode. My Missoula doc was a recommendation from other women at work, and I have some serious disagreements with him despite his pedigree.

Finding someone who specializes in one specific disease, who actually knows what the fuck is going on with it, and who is competent to treat it, is extremely difficult. Complicate that with living in the underpopulated armpit of the US, and I'm either going to end up with substandard care or the expense of traveling and having to see a surgeon outside my insurance network.

So I've kind of come to the conclusion that having a hysterectomy isn't necessarily going to help. If my problems are centered in the uterus and ovaries, having them excised will help. If there are still adhesions elsewhere in the abdomen, as I suspect there are since my guts are all glued together, the hysterectomy isn't going to help much. Also, I'm starting to doubt the hormones-feed-implants theory. That means removing my ovaries isn't guaranteed to help, and the downsides of early menopause and HRT (osteoperosis, increased cancer risk, etc) suck balls. Since GnRH agonsits (Lupron, etc) do the same basic thing as a hysterectomy/oophrectomy, and are hellishly expensive AND have a fuckton of side effects, I'm not down with those, either.

I want to get better, but I don't want to half ass this or get maimed in the process. Conservative surgical treatment sounds like the best bet at this point.

3 Frequencies We're All Receiving

Hemoglobin

7:14 PM on Tuesday, the 22nd of April, 2008

Eww, it's all purple and lumpy now.

Like I needed more scar tissue on my kunckles. Dammit.

 We're All Receiving

CHOMP

1:31 PM on Tuesday, the 22nd of April, 2008

Fuggin' server rack bit me. Bastard. I was trying to reconfigure the firewall after a change in settings blew up our connection with Billings, and I had too short a length of CAT-5 hooked up between my modem and the firewall. When I shifted the laptop to plug in another cable, the firewall tottered on the edge of the rack and threatened to plunge onto the concrete floor. I made a grab for it...

...and caught two of my fingers and the side of my wrist on the pointy corner of one of the switches. Lost most of the skin off my ring finger knuckle, took a chunk out of the little finger knuckle, and bruised my wrist. Like usual, it's nothing that needs medical attention, but FUCK it hurts. And my ring finger's still bleeding. I think I might have seen bone, but that could have been part of the flap of skin. It's hard to say, because once it started bleeding, I couldn't see much of anything.

Stupid pointy computer bits.

And as it turned out, the short cable would have kept the firewall from hitting the floor anyway. Dammit. I hate bleeding for nothing.

2 Frequencies We're All Receiving

Seattle or Bust

6:11 PM on Sunday, the 20th of April, 2008

Yo, Seattle peeps. Fenrir and I are headed out for Emerald City Con and might be looking for someplace to stay. We're clean, well-behaved, and potty trained, though Fenrir has been known to snore.

I realize it's going to be a crazy weekend, but if anyone's got a floor or couch we could crash on, that'd rock. We'd buy you food or something.

If not, I'm going to reserve a room in Kirkland before the end of the week.

Also, if anyone wants to hang out, point out a good place to eat, or get some beers, holler at me. I'll give you my cell number so we can coordinate.

10 Frequencies We're All Receiving

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